We hear from a lot of parents of tweens and teens, asking which deodorant is gentlest, what a "simple" skincare routine actually looks like for an 11-year-old, and sometimes bigger questions like, how do I even talk to my kid about their body without making it a whole thing?

This is something I think about a lot, as both a founder and a parent. Most of us picked up disempowering messages about our bodies when they were changing (a comment, a joke, a silence) long before we had the tools to sort out if they were even true. The frustrating part? You might still hear those messages when you look in the mirror, or get dressed.

That's the thing about body shame. It rarely stays contained to the moment it started in.

So when we set out to write about tween and teen body care, I didn't want it to just be a routine breakdown. I wanted to talk to people who actually know how to do this well, and who we genuinely believe in: Dr. Mona Bagrodia and Dr. Lisa Klein, pediatricians with Turning Teen.

Turning Teen is a puberty and body-education program built on a simple observation - schools spend only a few hours a year on this material, a pediatrician's appointment is too short for a real conversation about it, and a lot of parents freeze up simply because they're not sure what the "right" thing to say even is. Turning Teen exists to close that gap, through workshops for girls, boys, and families, taught in classrooms, community spaces, and online. Because knowledge is empowering - for you and your kids.

Dr. Bagrodia is a pediatrician in San Diego with two young sons of her own, and teaches Turning Teen workshops throughout the San Diego area. Dr. Klein practices at Child Health Associates, spent years teaching medical residents before turning her focus to develop this program, and now teaches Turning Teen workshops all over the country and online.

I asked them questions about all of it. Here's our conversation, edited for length and clarity.

"Am I Normal?"

When a tween starts noticing their body changing, what do you wish every parent knew about how to talk about it?

So many parents worry they're going to say the wrong thing. It's much better to talk about it imperfectly than to avoid the conversation altogether. We also don't have to teach kids that they need to love every single thing about their bodies every single day. Puberty can feel awkward and uncomfortable! Instead, help them understand why their body is changing, reassure them that change is normal, and shift some of the focus away from what their body looks like and toward what their body can do. And give it time. Puberty is a process, physically and emotionally. Kids need time to get comfortable with a body that may suddenly feel very different.

What does "removing shame" actually look like in a real conversation - is there a phrase or approach you come back to often?

Normalize, normalize, normalize. We remind kids that puberty is something their body is supposed to do. In fact, as pediatricians, we would be concerned if those changes never happened. That doesn't mean every part of puberty is fun. Body odor, acne, periods, hair growth, changing bodies - some, or all, of it can feel awkward. But awkward doesn't mean bad or embarrassing. These are simply things bodies do for important reasons.

Is there a moment from teaching Turning Teen that's stuck with you?

One thing we hear again and again from kids, whether they say it directly or ask it through their questions, is essentially: "Am I normal?" We remember a boy in one of our Body Basics for Boys classes who was worried because he was much bigger and taller than his friends. We talked about how puberty doesn't happen on one exact timeline. Some kids start earlier, some start later, and there is a very wide range of normal. That reassurance is incredibly powerful at this age.

It's Not Just Their Body That's Changing

How much of what tweens are anxious about is physical vs. just not knowing what's "normal"?

So much anxiety at this age comes back to wondering, "is this normal?" That can apply to physical changes, but it applies to emotional changes, too. Emotions often feel bigger and less predictable during puberty. Part of growing up is learning how to recognize and manage those emotions, and that's a skill that develops over time. Adults don't get it right 100% of the time either!

Why This Conversation Matters More Right Now

What are you seeing more of in your practice lately? What's different now vs. even five years ago?

We are seeing puberty beginning a bit earlier, as young as age 8. The average age of a first period has gradually decreased over the past several decades, and currently sits at 11.9 years old in the United States. But one of the biggest differences for kids today is the enormous amount of information, and misinformation, they're exposed to online. Tweens can get advice about puberty, skincare, bodies, weight, and appearance from influencers before they've ever talked about those subjects with a trusted adult. That's why we encourage families to identify trusted adults early. Kids should know: these are the people I can go to when I see or hear something online and I'm not sure if it's true.

Skincare Basics, Kept Simple

What's your honest take on when a kid is "ready" for things like deodorant, a real skincare routine, etc.?

If they're asking for it, that's usually a pretty good sign they're ready! If it's something like wearing a bra or using deodorant, we say go for it even if it's not totally needed. After all, we would always rather a kid not have to worry about being "the stinky kid" at school. With skincare, we encourage parents to keep it simple and age-appropriate. Tweens generally don't need the complicated, multi-step routines they see online, and young skin doesn't need harsh anti-aging ingredients being promoted by influencers. For most tweens, the basics are enough: wash their face morning and night, use a moisturizer with SPF in the morning, and moisturize at night. If acne becomes an issue, that's a good time to talk with their pediatrician or dermatologist about what products or treatments are appropriate. The best routine isn't the fanciest one. It's a simple, appropriate routine they'll actually do consistently.

Any go-to advice for the body odor and sweat conversation specifically?

Once puberty gets going, every day becomes a shower day, especially for active tweens! Teach them what actually needs attention: underarms, feet, and other areas that get sweaty. Put on clean underwear and socks every day, and use deodorant consistently. We also encourage parents to approach hygiene as a new skill rather than a criticism. Instead of "you smell," try, "your body's changing, which means it's time to change how we take care of it."

What We Can Do, As the Adults

What do you wish parents would stop doing, and what would you tell them to do instead?

We would love for parents to become more aware of how often we comment on bodies, including our own. Kids hear us when we criticize our bodies, talk about needing to lose weight, label foods as "good" or "bad," or comment on someone else's size or appearance. Even when those comments aren't directed at our children, they're still learning from them. Instead, try to make your home a place where bodies aren't constantly being evaluated. Talk about food as something that gives us energy, helps us grow, and can also bring us pleasure and connection. Talk about movement in terms of strength, health, and how it makes us feel, not how it makes us look. And when your child's body changes during puberty, resist the urge to make every change a big announcement. A changing body deserves to change without commentary.

The Goal Isn't to Have Every Answer

If a parent only takes away one thing from this post, what would you want it to be?

Puberty is a multi-year process, and the conversations you have with your child should evolve as they do. You do not need to explain everything in one giant "puberty talk." Start the conversations early. Keep them small. Keep coming back to them. Most importantly, make sure your child knows that no question is off-limits. And if they ask something you don't know the answer to, it's perfectly OK to say, "I don't know, but we'll find out together." The goal isn't to have every answer. It's to become the person your child knows they can come to with every question.

LSF Skincare for Tweens & Teens

This is the whole idea behind our Clear Skin and Balanced Skin sets - both have the same gentle three steps, just the first step, cleansing, adjusts to what their skin is actually doing. Clear Skin includes our Activated Charcoal bar, for acne-prone skin. Balanced Skin includes the Geranium Rose bar, for oily or combination skin. Either way: cleanse, tone, moisturize.

Something Extra for Their Routine

Once the basics are handled, a couple of small "just for me" additions can make a new routine feel less like a chore and more like something they've chosen. Our Honey Lip Treatment and Botanical Butter are the kind of small, good-smelling extras tweens tend to love.